Continuing with the last feeling to focus on in collaboration: Acceptance. This is so hard to try to write and summarize. I’m quite happy with this first draft and I hope my mind will have processed this some more when I go back to rewriting it.
FIRO-theory calls this being liked (and the first version talked about love instead), but I think acceptance is a much better description for it. We want people to accept us for who we are, and we fear being rejected for our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. This is why many people fear to give (and receiving) feedback; we don’t want others to reject us for the feedback, and we don’t want to hear feedback that would either humiliate or make us feel unaccepted.
Going back to the role list: If you at the start of the meeting go through the role list, you both help them feel more competent and give them a role to hide behind. By hiding, I mean that when they comment on other’s ideas, they do it based on their role and not as the person, for example, the specialist on product Y. This can help people to start opening up and realize that it is ok to have a different opinion.
Other things you can do during a meeting:
• Listen and focus on what a person is saying
• Give positive feedback when someone disagrees